Why love disappears

Quora is the best answer to any question. Ask a question, get a great answer. Learn from experts and get insider knowledge. For you. World globe An icon of the world globe, indicating different international options. Get the Insider App. When there is no respect and importance, love walks out without serving a notice period. Issues in marriage never end and thus it leads to the death of love between the couple.

If a marriage goes through the hailstorm of issues, all thunder strikes love. Love dies in the meantime and there is nothing you can do unless your issues aren't solved or gone.

Love once dies never appears and it is hardly ever seen again in between the couple. These are the reasons behind the disappearance of love. In order to not let love disappear, you need to better your approach towards marriage and thus love will automatically serve you both as a couple and will fill your hearts with love for each other.

For Quick Alerts. Subscribe Now. For Daily Alerts. Must Watch. Every morning when I wake up I see the bike! Is Your Partner Pocketing You? When they start to pull away, do you chase them instinctively? What are some changes that you could make to help yourself? Are there ways you could stage an early intervention for yourself if you see early warning signs of ghosting with a new friend or boyfriend?

Does the other person have a pattern of ghosting? Can you see the pattern without feeling a need to rescue or blame? You cannot hug them long enough to magically put all their broken parts back together again. You cannot blame them viciously enough to teach them never to do it again in fact, direct shaming and blaming of them will probably have the opposite effect — they are ghosting to avoid feelings. Can you be grateful for the time that you had together without having it trigger a desire to contact the ghoster?

It may be that gratitude will trigger an ache inside of you, a longing for the ghoster. It may be that gratitude will trigger feelings of love for the ghoster. Either of those and more can make you reach out to the ghoster in a weak moment. Let me help you to sort through all of this. Reach out to me here. Success Stories. Tips on thriving at midlife. Tips on creating happy relationships in midlife.

Book a Free Minute Consultation! It felt like emotional truth. I should have a cigarette. And my vision would be clearer. There are other things too. If we start feeling afraid, if we start feeling unseen, if old trauma triggers itself, if we are afraid to show our deepest self and we kind of hide that self, all of those things, will make love begin… the feeling of love, begin to disappear.

They say that love is a process of rupture and repair and this is kind of a magic thing if we can give ourselves space. And Eli Finkel , brilliant researcher showed a diagram at one point in a TED Talk of what happens to the vast, vast, vast, vast, vast majority of spousal relationships.

And what it is, is if you could picture a gradual line heading down hill. And that happens to almost everybody. And why is that?

Because it takes work to kind of dig down and find the freshness again and again in a relationship. Is that such a beautiful sunset? You have lost that bid. You have made a bid, your partner missed it. The more bids you catch, the more intimacy there is.

Every bid lost, especially important ones, creates a tiny bit of numbing, a tiny bit of disappearance of the freshness and the aliveness of that intimacy. And every bid seen, caught, and handed back with consciousness and presence enriches the feeling of love. But the feelings of that kind of very alive intimacy had gone subterranean and at that moment they come alive again and we get to do that.

It has gone subterranean for deep reasons. And it can reappear, and will reappear, when we allow space for ourselves, allow space for our partners, make the extra effort to make room for them and to think about them and to think about their experience.

And without it, our hearts become kind of flinty and hardened. So this experience of the love going subterranean, love eclipsing and then love coming back is part of the ride of the journey.

And have you ever had the feeling of love, feeling like it reappears? What are those things that make love reappear? What can we do? And another issue is …. For me, time and space and time for reflection is when love reappears most easily.

With every person in your life who feels like a treasure and it feels like love has gone somewhat subterranean, you can reclaim it in so many cases and all of us can, and that is a gift that makes our entire life richer.